i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
