i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
