Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize