Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
