Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize