God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
