Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
