He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
