I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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