yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize