I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
