sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Boobs speak an international language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize