she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
