I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
This house was built for laser tag.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
