he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
