Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
