I hope mine doesn't look like that
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
We have so much sex to catch up on
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it