It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize