I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
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