you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
