smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
there is glitter all over my balls
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