I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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