No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
