Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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