a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
