I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
