We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
