she was so not down for the gang bang
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
