the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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