They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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