He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
