i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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