Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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