im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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