I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
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