just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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