Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize