This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize