Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
