The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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