I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
