Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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