i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
