How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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