Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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