im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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