Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?