if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.