I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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