i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize