have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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